Imagination Connoisseur, Vesna Lukic, takes all of us in the Post-Geek Singularity on a hilarious tour of “hot and steamy” media as she looks for a way to fight off the flu and raise her body temperature in the process.
Get well soon, Vesna, or at the very least – send us another letter!
Hello Robert and the rest of Singularity!
As I’ve been sick for a few days, and I couldn’t lower my body temperature in any way, not with medicine (chemical or natural), so I figured out that the best way to do so is by sweating. And the only way to do it is by watching movies.
Of course, porn would be the easiest way, but I didn’t want to be that shallow. So I will skip that, for now.
First, I tried some erotic movies. The first that came to my mind was 9-1/2 WEEKS. That should work, right?
Micky Rourke was pretty hot at that time and Kim Bassinger was always hot. Everything was working just fine until that feeding scene – sorry, but I like to see what I’m putting in my mouth. And that include food. Next: 50 SHADES (of Shit). The story about a low self-esteem, nut-case, rich guy and a simple gold digger playing innocent could make me sweat only if I would beat them to death.
Ok, maybe something subtle … like a Rom-Com. I always liked that.
First, I tried RUNAWAY BRIDE … Great. It’s a story about a girl who doesn’t know what she wants but also doesn’t know what she doesn’t want and a guy who took her back after being publicly humiliated buy the very same. Yeah right!
If somebody like that would appear at my doorstep, the only way he could have my hand is as a punch on his most sensitive place – and it’s not his nose.
Next: MY BEST FRIEND’S WEDDING … Oh man, who ever said that this was a comedy had a higher fever than me. A girl chasing her best friend, who, by the way, never wanted her, and the only guy who was perfect for her was gay.
This is not a comedy. This is a tragedy.
And when the Rupert Everett’s character told her: “Maybe there won’t be marriage, maybe there won’t be sex, but God there will be dancing!” – I would tell him “Shove it in your butt” … let at least one of us be happy.
Ok, so the Rom-Com movies didn’t work. Let’s try some series.
I started to watch THE WITCHER. Although I liked it overall, I have one complaint about it.
Having such a nice male specimen, and not to use him in an “action” is big missed opportunity. I mean, the show is rated R, so one should expect some steaming, rocking machine.
In the first episode when he had a close encounter with Renfry, they didn’t even show us anything else but his face. Such a waste of a rest of his body, which is, most of the time, full covered. Luckily, he wears tight pants so we can at least have a glimpse on what lays beneath.
Granted, I’m just half-way through the first season, so things could turn for the better. A girl can always hope, right?
Well, I guess I ‘m back to porn. At least with porn, the things you’re expecting is the things you are getting, and I don’t care if I’m shallow.
I’m sorry if this letter sounds like a random babbling, but I’m having a fever after all. It’s nice to have a good excuse .
– Vesna L.